So I went hunting this week, now before anybody calls TPWD about nuthin' being in season we were huntin' wild hogs. Admittedly hunting is really an excuse for us boys to go out to the country, sit by a campfire, drink and eat a lot of meat. But still it is a good thing for my buddies and I to take our boys out of the suburbs without electronics, cable TV, or even running water for that matter. Normally we get out a few times a year, but with the belly on the scene, it could have been touch and go. Normally my wife is understanding about these forays into the gritty west, but as I have said, the game has a whole new set of rules and it ain't Monopoly and there ain't no get out of jail free card. The key here was to stock up some quality time with my beloved and make sure the belly was happy and contented, good food and plenty of time doing domestic activities. Then the phrase "I was thinking about taking the boy hunting over spring break" slips into the conversation. Very important to use the word "was" in that sentence, it demonstrates an idea of leaving, but also gives the impression that the foolhardy idea was quickly abandoned. Now the next step is to reintroduce the idea along with all the positives, more meat for the freezer, quality time with the boy, and some manly time shooting and drinking whiskey. The best thing about my LBN is her understanding of the masculine needs and appealing to that was by far my best bet. However one can never underestimate the new paradigm of the belly universe, and I knew I had to cover every contingency before I would be in the clear. So as our departure approached I spent a long weekend making sure the belly was attended to, and even called in reinforcements(the sister-in-law) in my absence. We did leave for a few days, but what I have realized is others will never be able to attend to the belly the way you the expectant daddy, can, and while you think you someone else can step in for you, that is a big, big mistake. I thought the sister-in-law, having been visited by the belly three times herself, would be an acceptable substitute, I didn't realize other bellys do not have the temperament for the job and in fact make matters worse. So if you are going to leave the belly, think twice, and then don't do it. The belly needs attention, and it doesn't want it from anybody but me. But you know, that's kinda cool.....